Just put my little girl on the bus for her first day of school.
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| *sniff* |
My heart is pounding--about what I'd expect after bungee jumping.
We were so nervous that she'd be scared, anxious, or even experience a meltdown when it was time to board. We had also expected the bus to be very late--which was an educated guess. And then, as should be just as educated a guess, kids surprise us. She was GREAT!
When the bus pulled up, she jumped up and down with excitement--not unlike Daddy's heart. Then we boarded together, whereupon I was scolded and kicked off! Apparently the school forbids parents from getting on the bus. In trouble already. Full circle.
What a milestone. Yes it's "only" preschool. But I sent my baby off on her own to do something that, frankly, I know very little about. We saw her classroom, met her teacher, read the class info--but she's now at school without me--listening to other people's rules, and...having a life.
Boy is attending another school, which starts early next week--and he gets to ride on Daddy's bus. Maybe a bit more dull. But they get to experience independence from one another, which makes Wifey and me really excited. See, when you're around Boy--there is little independence to be had. He consumes the spotlight, and Girlie has not been exempt from his influence--except she's never known life otherwise! So this is especially important for her!
Breathing again. Holy $%#! I had also wanted to set up a video recording of the event. Yah, best laid plans of butterfly-ridden dads.
Boy noticed that I was flustered upon returning inside. I was futzing with my laptop, to write this, and he said, "Daddy, are you sad that [sis] is gone?" We then had a discussion about anxiety, love, pride, and nostalgia. Can I tell you how hard it is to toddlerize those concepts?! Maybe it was good for me too. :)
Now we're going to find a city bus to ride. Because that's how it works with twins when one gets to do something the other doesn't.
In love with them.
3 years old. Holy toddleredo.
As
the stages and milestones come and go, I sometimes catch myself
forgetting what we've all been through. I mean, while keeping it in
perspective, it's been...really hard. By perspective, I mean that I'm
well aware that we're all reasonably healthy and we have the food and
shelter we need. Good fortune. Given that, man has it ever been
rough!
Now back to aforementioned forgetfulness--before it's too late. We've made it
through the spit-up-geyser stage. We've survived teething, averbal
frustation, diapermania x2, and a handful of ER visits.
And
what have we learned, class? For one, I've learned that we adapt. And
adaptation doesn’t always feel warm and cozy. Sometimes it simply
means that our survivalist minds make/allow us to forget how much the
previous crises hurt relative to the current one(s)! In other words,
damn this whiny, "I don't want to ______!!" Stage. It's the
worst ever! Nothing could be worse than thi—oh, right. I literally
cried from all the spit-up in year one. I didn't think the three-hour
sleep cycles would ever end. I thought for sure I'd be changing 12
diapers a day. Forever.
Well, we forget. To some degree. But,
sadly, we forget much of the good stuff too. I don't remember what it
felt like to hold two babies whose combined weight was about that of a gallon of milk. And I can't quite access the thought of how it
felt to pat their little bottoms as they stuck up in the air while
they slept.
So all I seem to have, aside from terabytes of
pics and video, is the thought of the current
bads and goods. And so I try to stay mindful that the bads are just
stages that will fade into history. BUT, generally speaking, they
don't make it onto video!
To stem the excessive curmudgetude,
please note that the twins are far more delightful than not! I am so
happy that they can often verbalize their needs and that potty
training is well underwear. Way. They are funny, learning, and
increasingly different in personality.
And I love the socks
off 'em.
Wait. Didn't I already write this blog?
